Translator/Editor : Léabyss
Gale’s POV
The shaking of my body does not stop.
My entire body trembles terribly, even the hand that holds the sword. I have never been so afraid. There is a huge haze that covers my heart and my head and all my thoughts disappear at once. However, in front of my eyes is an unconscious man who continues to shed a lot of blood from the left side of his body.
I did.
I did this with my own hands …
To, Chika.
I.
I.
I.
Just me.
I can’t stop screaming from the bottom of my heart. The sword I held tore through Chika’s skin and it felt almost the same as cutting paper. I know I need to treat him and see his condition, but my body doesn’t want to move.
“Gale! Gale !! I understand your feelings, but we have to be with him!”
At first I could only look at Doug, after a while, I was finally able to move.
First, we must stop the wound from bleeding. The opening on Chika’s shoulder is deep and scandalous. Apparently the lowered blade seemed to have stopped thanks to the bone, but it was already completely chipped. What if I …? No, just imagining it makes my body shake again. I couldn’t look directly at Chika as Douglas put a piece of his shirt on him.
“Parish! Parish hurry up! Johann and Theo, catch that man! Gale, can you squeeze here?”
“I … I don’t know what happened …”
“It’s okay. For the moment, regrets don’t matter at all. Focus only on what is in front of you.”
“Ok…”
Parish rushes to squeeze the wound and checks on Chika’s general condition.
“Shit. The momentum of the sword hurt the bone. He appears to have a fever and his physical strength has been reduced enough to do something difficult. It would be dangerous to apply a strong healing technique to restore the condition to the level of the blood vessel. I can hurt the baby … But, we have no choice.”
“So what can we do?”
“Stop the bleeding … However, the pain will continue. I need your approval.”
“It’s okay. We trust you, Parish … Proceed in whatever way you see fit.”
Parish gave my words a huge nod and began to prepare for the healing.
“Even if he’s unconscious, the discomfort should be noticeable in him … So, both of you must hold Chika firmly.”
Doug and I lay down next to him and grabbed Chika. I hold him by the head and put my arm between his teeth so he doesn’t bite his tongue. Douglas presses his legs against Chika’s and gently wraps his waist.
“Do it!”
Parish enters a state of total concentration to begin to apply his magic. When the light began to envelop the wound, Chika began to cry and scream.
“UMM!!”
We desperately hold Chika’s body because he is convulsing terribly. It was intense, even though it was such a slim and small body. I think the power to bite my arm is very powerful too.
The blood rushing from the wound stopped, but a pulsing scar remained on his shoulder. Seeing him, my heart became terribly painful again.
“The rest of the treatment will be less aggressive. Now, it’s okay if we let Chika rest a bit earlier …”
“No … May I be by your side for a moment longer?”
When Douglas looks at me, he shrugs my shoulders and says:
“I’m going to see the man. There are obviously things I’d like to hear from him, but I’d better do it after Chika has woken up. I can’t calmly judge him if it’s just me and him.”
Doug pats me on the back and turns to the man.
The arm that I cut off appeared to be being treated by Johann, but it shows no movement or any indication that he wants to escape or make a fuss.
At the end of the treatment, Chika’s shoulders were wrapped with a large number of bandages and his left arm was suspended by a makeshift mechanism … Parish got up as well and allowed me to have a moment alone. I hold Chika and I feel like my chest is starting to fill with his scent and the temperature that still exudes … It is so pleasant, I missed him so much. Chika, can you forgive me? I was crazy, so crazy that I couldn’t look around me and ended up acting impulsively. I was not thinking about your feelings.
That is the result in the end.
But, now I want to make sure that you are back in my arms. That you are here, that you breathe … And that our son moves.
✤✤✤✤✤✤
How long has it been? Chika, who was breathing wildly, seems to calm down a bit now.
“I heard enough from the dragon bastard … But how can we punish him if you did something so stupid just for him? Um?”
Doug, who returned, seems to be relieved as he talks to him. With his fingers running over Chika’s sleeping face.
The joy of getting your loved one back is overflowing from both his body and mine … And Richt can’t seem to stop laughing and jumping around either. Although he also looked terribly worried.
Sometimes he would say:
“I’m sorry … I couldn’t help Mommy.”
“Richt …” I hold him with my free hand and bring him close to Chika’s chest. “Richt is always helping us. Not only him, but also your little brother.”
“Really?”
“It would have been difficult without Richt.”
“We are bad parents, but we made our Richt worry a lot. Thanks for working so hard.”
“Yes?”
“Oh, it’s all thanks to Richt.”
“Mommy is going to be very happy!”
“We already are. You’re really cool, Richt.”
Doug strokes Richt’s head while he just flicks his tail back and forth … And then a hand began to slowly move up.
“My baby…”
“Chika! You’re good? Do not move…”
“Gale?”
“Yes. It’s me, Chika …”
“Oh, you’re the old Gale again.”
He raises his fingers and very slowly touches my cheeks until he stops under my eyes. His hands are very small and cold, but they seem infinitely kind when they come forward to recognize me. It seems like he’s smiling for me …
“Richt, Douglas … Thank you.”
“Mom! Mommy, mommy, mommy !!”
“Chika, don’t move. You have to sleep a little more so that both of you can have strength. It’s okay?”
“Gale … I’m so sorry …”
After that, Chika closed his eyes again. His breathing is calm and he doesn’t seem to be in pain … This was probably the end of all the strength he had saved.
I caress his chest and ears.
I don’t know why Chika apologizes to me when I’m the idiot.
“Gale, we should rest too. After all, Chika is very delicate and we’re going to hang around here for a while.”
“I’m so sorry about what happened.”
“It’s over, it doesn’t matter.”
Doug said nothing more and took a moment to look at Richt, who was sleeping soundly on Chika’s chest. His delicate appearance, with the bandages wrapped around his arm, makes me think that it surely continues to hurt too much … But his breathing is soft and rhythmic. He has less meat compared to the last time I saw him, but his face is still beautiful. I lightly kissed his lips, his forehead and said goodnight.
I couldn’t forget what happened. The sensation of cutting Chika is still completely running through my hands. I understand that, if I had killed that man, I would have slowly walked into irreparable madness. I would have fallen to a point where I could not return and would have been swallowed up by a painful whirlwind. Chika always thought of me … And surely he saw that I was filled with a horrible darkness.
Even if I was able to get Chika back after this, I am no longer me. I am worried and scared out of my mind. If that happened to me now, maybe later I can attack my children and end up killing them. I’m afraid that madness will hit me again. I’m definitely not good for him, I’m not good for anyone.
I went to the Pewton and untied the rope that was attached to a tree. I was determined to take the reins and get out of there … Until some little hands circled my waist.
“Gale…”
“Chika? God. Why are you here? Who said you could walk? You’re good?”
I have to check him out. He definitely shouldn’t be in front of me. You can’t act like nothing happened!
“Come on, I’ll take you again …”
“Gale … what are you doing here in the middle of the night?”
“That’s …”
“Why do you want to leave me …? Is by…?”
Chika looks down at his shaking, bandaged arm.
“I’m sorry, I’m sorry … I’m really sorry.”
“Chika …”
Large tears completely overflow from his pale little cheeks.
“I knew … I felt like you were going to have a really bad time, but … I still …”
“No, your behavior was fine. Hey look at me If I had killed that man … I wasn’t me, and you knew it.”
“It was kind of stupid …” Chika continues to cry and clings to my chest with his free hand as he repeats the word: “It was stupid.”
“Try to breathe slowly … You have to breathe. Okay my love? Slow.”
As I hold Chika, we head to the side of the nearby stream and sit there. He seems very worried and scared and can only sob:
“I hated him for a long time and told him I’d like to see him get killed … But, when Gale raised his sword there, I didn’t want him to …”
“Oh, I know.”
“I wanted you to come back, I wanted you to be Gale again … Ah, I’m so sorry.”
“Don’t cry, that’s how you are. I love you just this way, impulsive and absolutely kind.”
But he continue to shed tears on my chest. It was a lovely little creature that kept shaking.
“What I did is unforgivable! I risked my son! If I had done it wrong this child would be dead! Maybe even …! Gale … I’m so sorry. I even made you feel bad about this!”
“But nothing happened…”
“My choice was selfish and wrong.”
Chika’s power to hold me grows stronger.
“Chika … It’s over. You don’t have to suffer for me, okay? You have to be okay for me to be okay too.” I caress his back, neck and go up to wipe his eyes as well. “What happened can no longer be changed … It is a teaching.”
“Gale. You forgive me…?”
“That’s my line. Can you forgive me my love? Excuse me for trying to run away every chance I get.”
“I don’t need to forgive Gale. It’s all due to my arrogance …”
“Chika, will you allow me to love you in a better way from now on? Will you allow me to hold you and my child with these hands?”
“No, you have to say: Will you allow me to continue loving you as well as I have done so far?”
“I’ll never hurt you again … God, I feel like we’re being very clumsy and corny.”
“Yes. Douglas will be mad if he sees this!”
The smile finally returned to Chika, although it was little by little.
“Chika, I love you from the bottom of my heart. It has never changed and will never change.”
“Yes, Gale. I love you too much, clumsy and cheesy and kind …”
We violently seek our lips, as if to recover something of what we had lost in so much darkness. We can only hear the current of the stream, the sound of the water, and the birds around us.
I was very happy, and he was with me.
“But I have to be prepared, Doug is quite mad at me … I’m waiting for his sermon.”
“Yes, I must apologize to Douglas and … No, I have to apologize to everyone who came to pick me up.”
Chika is thinking about complicated things as usual while putting on a rather serious face.
“Chika, it’s very cold. Go back first and rest in the tent.”
“Yes. You’re not going … are you?”
“Didn’t I just promise that I will love you all my life and be with you forever?”
“Alright. Good night then.”
Chika returns to his tent with a slow step … But I continue to watch the gentle river as I start licking the traces of Chika’s bites scattered across my arms.
“Douglas, you can get out of there.”
“Did you stop being an idiot?”
“What were you going to do? Chase me dramatically?”
“What were you going to do? Kiss him or swallow him?”
“I stopped because I was thinking of you. I didn’t want you to die of envy.”
“Of course, of course. You are a saint … Next time I’ll eat him in front of you!”
“Weren’t we going to have a threesome?”
“… Hell yeah! That’s my Gale! But don’t worry me anymore, damn it! I feel like I’m going to have a heart attack if I continue to have so much emotion.”
The events of the last few days go through my head like a running Pewton.
“Ah, I miss Chika’s homemade food… I want to eat Chika’s homemade food soon.”
“Yes…”
“I want to bathe with Chika again.”
“Yes.”
“And to become Chika’s favorite animal again and be the three of us again.”
“Yes.”
“Chika, Richt, Hikaru and the baby … In that stupid house with you.”
“Y…”
Doug waited for me to finish crying … He was really very relieved now. I always thought having the same partner as my best friend would be a disaster, but now I’m thankful.
“Thank you…”
BL snack 